September Newsletter:
Oh, how I welcome fall. This year, the seasons transitioned swiftly from sunshine and heat to clouds and rain. I don’t mind. My garden seems to love it. A second crop of green beans is in bloom; my fall lettuce and cauliflower look happy with the cooler weather. And I am enjoying not having to water twice a day. We’ve planned a few trips for this month. One is with George’s hiking friends, and another is with friends we’ve had for 40+ years. George and I will be celebrating our 52nd anniversary while in Ashland, seeing a Shakespearean play. I feel blessed to have had all those years with my husband. I am thankful we made it through all the ups and downs common in marriage. Now we are reaping the comforts of having someone around who knows you well, has your best interests at heart, and extends love unconditionally. We often tell each other how fortunate we are that at this time in our lives, we still have each other. Marriages go through many iterations in how they function. How couples operate often changes as cultural trends shift over the years. Most women my age experienced major shifts in marriage roles while the equality struggles were going on during that time period. For the first time, we were gaining the freedom to have our own checking and savings accounts, to buy a car or a home without a co-signer, and to have our husband, or significant other, contribute more to managing a household and to child-raising when both parties worked. Then there was the issue of gaining control over our own bodies! Unfortunately, I find it unsettling to have a movement occurring that’s trying to push back on women’s freedoms.
Seasons mark changes in patterns. With each pattern shift, there will be the need to adapt to the changes that season brings. The metaphor of seasons is often used to refer to a period in our lives. For everything, there is a season. When we speak of major life transitions, we are talking about changes in our personal, social, and professional lives. Change happens slowly in some areas of our lives and rapidly in others. It has been said that with the introduction of AI, our world is evolving at a speed we have never seen before. This rapid change can leave a person anxious. We don’t know what to expect, what will be expected of us, or what the long-term consequences might be as the change happens. What we do know is that just like with human beings, machines have limitations and blind spots. How will this powerful tool of artificial intelligence be used to better human existence, and how will it be used to exploit, manipulate, and control? We have already seen that happening. I follow three newsletters on AI and robotics; what is happening is mind-blowing.
Another predicted change is our weather. The Super El Niño will affect this fall and winter weather in the US and globally. Another unpredictable challenge. Am I giving you a tight chest and a sour stomach? Keep reading for some tips on how to lessen your concerns.
ACTION CURES FEAR!
Tips: The goal is not to pretend these concerns are imaginary. The better approach is to acknowledge concerns, plus have agency (your free will to exert control by making choices that influence your own life and environment) rather than fear and helplessness.
1. If you need to, limit compulsive news exposure and focus on a few trusted sources.
2. Remind yourself how you have handled uncertainty before (what worked and where you needed to make changes now). Maintain self-care and supportive relationships.
3. Make a list of issues you feel threatened by. Be specific when you list them. Undefined threats make anxiety thrive. Specific problems are easier for the brain to handle.
4. Put your worries into three buckets: control, influence, accept. Spend most of your time on what you can control (like changing your passwords, digital security protection, preparing for power outages) and influence (advocacy, voting, writing to Congress).
5. Since an individual can’t carry responsibility for all the environmental changes that could happen with AI, choose two or three actions, like energy conservation, supporting organizations that are doing important associated environmental work, etc. Then allow what actions you have taken to be “enough for now”.
6. Work on building a financial safety net. Anxiety lessens when you know you can handle a disruption. Have an emergency fund, review current monthly expenses to see if you can lower them, and make sure your affairs (wills, power of attorney, and financial documents) are in order.
7. Preparation can make you feel freer, not more frightened.
8. Importantly, preserve and deliberately engage in your ordinary life. Do whatever gives your life meaning. One of anxiety’s biggest costs is allowing a feared future to consume a perfectly real present. You can do this alongside creating a weekly “I did something” list to record concrete actions you have taken. This gives your mind evidence that you are competent and can handle what might be coming.
9. Finally, if reasonable concern brings overwhelming anxiety and is disrupting enjoying your life, see a therapist or psychologist who uses cognitive-behavioral approaches for anxiety and intolerable uncertainty.
Affirmation: “I don’t have to solve the future; I need to prepare reasonably for it, influence what I can, and continue living my life.”
Book Review: In honor of Dolly Parton, I am recommending Run, Rose, Run, a novel co-written by James Patterson and Dolly Parton. Knowing the story centered on a country western singer’s struggle to advance in her career, I couldn’t help but think of Dolly during the protagonist’s journey. I appreciated the story gave insights into the country music industry. Run, Rose, Run was an enjoyable, fast-paced read!
My Publishing Journey: Another delay affected my non-fiction book release. Everything I have done to publish this small book has been a trial-and-error learning experience. After revising the manuscript and cover measurements on Amazon, I had to resubmit to IngramSpark. Amazon has been much easier to deal with and helped me see that even though my journal lines looked okay in the formatting software, the print copy had the lines spread into the margins. Now I have a month’s delay, which is not the best for marketing. Through the frustration, I keep threatening my husband that I am going to quit writing and publishing. I am not sure I can let it go, however. What I will do from here on out is to go at my own pace, not compare my trajectory to other authors within my publishing company, and celebrate when each piece I write goes out into the world.
You could help me reach more readers by suggesting my book if you are a member of a book club. I would love to come as a guest or visit the group through Zoom or FaceTime. There are discussion questions at the back of the book. Contact me at conniemorganwriter@comcast.net. Also, if you have read the book, please put a review on Amazon, Goodreads, and Barnes & Noble. I am working to reach the 600 mark.
More Than Luck Required is available anywhere books are sold in paperback, eBook, and audio.
***Connie’s Thoughts is for educational purposes only. It is not a substitute for mental health treatment. If you are in a crisis, please seek help. To reach the nationwide crisis support line, dial 988.
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In appreciation,
Connie
